Suddenly Can’t Connect

After a quick stopover at my (visually) favourite spot in all of China, Jiayuguan Fort in Gansu province, I speeded into Xinjiang province where the language was: Nothing. The whole province has been completely shut off from the outside world with no internet access, no phone access and not even access to text messaging inside the province.

Of course people have been doing without those things for thousands of years so it was a small thing for me to spend a week there … except it was so sad the way the Chinese government hasn’t changed since the Ming dynasty but keeps building more and more Great Walls Of China here and there every time they feel that somebody has transgressed.

Before the 2008 Beijing Olympics it was all foreigners who needed to be punished for the “Sacred Flame” not being allowed to run smoothly around the world, and the punishment was not being allowed a visa for China although they had tickets for the olympics. This time it’s the entire population of 20 million in a province three times the size of France and thereby all tourists visiting it (hundreds of hotels and shops have had to close down and only super expensive hotels are “convenient to stay in” for foreigners) which has to suffer for the constant paranoia of the regime. Walls, walls, must build walls! Must shut people out, and in!

Anybody who thinks China has “modernised” and “become part of the global village” should read up on their Ming history, then check the newspapers from the last two or three years.

Long Live Cantonese

There’s a big hullabaloo in the South China Morning Post this week. Historian Jason Wordie wrote about the so-called Third Culture Kids (born in one country, moved to Hong Kong, sent to boarding school in →

Taxing, Vexing Taxis

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Local Uncle Writes Own Language Wrong!!!!!

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Change

I needed an excuse to publish this photo. It was taken in Shenzhen (naturally) in what used to be an excellent little forest just across the square from the train station but which is now →

New Music Video

Ah, young love. It is splendid. ‘taller than’ is 高過 (gou go) whereas just ‘taller’ is 高啲 (gou di)。Could it be any easier?

Incinerator in English

This has nothing to do with Cantonese… but it kind of does. Because: When that 1972-technilogy behemoth starts spewing out its particles of 3,000 tonnes a day of burning rubbish wholesale, a lot of the →

New Cantonese Music Video … Coming!

We had a brilliant day on Sunday, venturing into the wilderness, sacrificing our safety (there were insects and a dead fish) so that YOU will more easily learn Cantonese, the language that sounds like two →

Learn Cantonese Through the Medium of Cards

I started learning Cantonese back in the mid-90s. Every morning I would take the 07:00 ferry to work and play cards with the swearing workers. I realised this was the best and fastest way to →

A Visit To Splendid China

Splendid China is exactly that – splendid. Only 15 to 20 minutes’ drive from Lo Wu is a world of semi naked guys dancing and dancing, Chinese opera shrieking through your bones and every famous →

Finally!!!! CantoNews, Cantonese Podcast For Lantau People, By Lantau People!

Woo-hoo! Finally there’s a podcast dealing only with Lantau issues, made by Lantau people like Carina (ah-Lin) (above) Rudolf (ah-Dak) and Tony (ah-Lei). OK, I admit it. I was planning on podcasts of five minutes →

Imperialistic Shit-Language

There is something about the internet that brings out the worst in people, like road rage. But also, of course, the best. People become so kind on behalf of others, on the internet. Last week, →

CantoNews Live from the Throbbing Metropolis of Mui Wo

Nick (a.k.a. Cassette) and I go to an Italian restaurant in the throbbing metropolis of Mui Wo, centre of the universe and make a programme about lots of interesting things – specifically the idiotic spelling →

CantoNews 5 Live From Roof!

Hello everybody, welcome to my roof! I normally arrange Sichuan dinners and lunches there, but this time it doubled as a recording studio for the best Cantonese news currently available on cassette! (And telex.) Talking →