Swine Flu – Only Hong Kong Supports It

I’m going back to those scraggy crags today! Now you can come too. Just click on China Tours and you’re there!

Did you know that “Good Friday” is called “Jesus experiences difficulties festival” (耶穌受難節）（ye sou sao laan jit) in Chinese? I bet you didn’t. But now you know, and by going on an Easter trip with →

Come with! Come with!

Epiphany

Dear chaps. In our series “screams and muffled cries from the vault” we bring you another item from our archives. It explains why, when you speak to a HK person in Cantonese, he answers you →

One Step Forward, 1.3 Billion Steps Back

Here’s a missive from 2008, just after the sacred Beijing Olympics when I finally could get a visa to China again: Not that I smoke joints anymore but I do get disillusioned sometimes about my →

Today’s* Weather Condition: 太陽

(＊Not “the weather today” as it’s again: FOGGY AS HELL! 有好大霧呀！Yao hou dai mou ah!) In fact this morning it looked like this: No, I was thinking of the weather, some weather, a weather （天氣）(Tin →

Today’s Classifier: 件

You thought it would be something about fog again, didn’t you? No, it’s about clothes. Not sure what the above item is, so let’s just call it: 一件衫 （yat gin saam) A piece, or item, →

Struggling On in Face of Adversity

Yesterday, Gweipo agonised over her own and her son’s struggle with pesky Mandarin. She invited her readers to comment on who or what’s to blame for us foreigners not being able to learn Cantonese and/or →

Learn All the Mando You Need in One Day!!!

Are you going into mainland China on a tour (with me for example), travelling for business or going there anyway? Even if you’re driven around by a personal guide, waited on hand and foot by →

New Service

Hello, my name is Cecilie (pronounced “Cecilia”) and I’m a China-holic. And Hongkie-holic. I’ve been living here for more than 20 years and speak, read and write Cantonese and Mandarin fluently. More than 20 years →

Make 2013 a Canto Year!

Have you made any New Year resolutions this year? I have. One of them is total world domination by Cantonese – while allowing the other languages to live too. Yes, that’s just the kind of →

Creeping Simplification

Who is supposed to be the mainlander, who the HK guy in this photo, advertising a big fiscal cooperation between the two entities? Who knows. But they will make shitloads of money, with the help of Hang Seng Bank. Oh, and the Hong Kong guy will have to learn simplified characters…

Welcome to Hang Seng Bank, home of my company account. I had to leave HSBC because it was just too, too crap. Little did I know that Hang Seng would be on the simplified bandwagon and emblazon the fact all over their headquarters in Central! So is this advert
1. Only for mainlanders? In which case it’s discriminatory and insulting.

2. For HK people? In which case they must now learn simplified characters which are not the official writing in Hong Kong.

Also, the mainlanders who come here to set up some economic enterprise will know normal characters. I have travelled in the mainland for 23 years but I’ve never come across a single one who couldn’t read normal characters. Never. Simplified characters cheapen the adverts and make them look mainland-y, corrupt and fake. Mainland people come to Hong Kong to get real stuff, not more of the stuff they have at home! Mainland restaurant frequently use normal characters on their wall signs to look more high-class. (This is illegal but they don’t care.)

I have written to Hang Seng Bank and complained. Last month there was a brouhaha about an Agnes B cafe in Tseung Kwan O, the menu of which was only simplified characters, or ‘crippled’ characters as people call them now. (Excellent pun in Chinese.) People wrote to complain and Agnes B immediately promised to change the writing to normal! It works. And for what it’s worth, I think the mainland will eventually return to normal characters. They know they’re more beautiful and make much more sense.

Priorities

I remember when I first came to hong Kong in 1989. The 垃圾蟲 (lap sap chung, litter bug) campaign had just started. Now people would be made to feel bad about littering. Woo-hoo! Nothing seemed to happen, except a lot of joking. Then, about ten years ago, the anti-litter fine kicked in. $1,500 for throwing anything anywhere except into a dustbin! Great idea.

Since then the 垃圾 situation has become, if anything, worse. At least in Pui O. Especially Pui O Beach. 貝澳沙灘 (Bui O Sa Tan, Shell Inlet Sand Beach.) Dozens of signs tell you not to throw sand, fly kites, smoke and play with balls, but throwing rubbish everywhere seems to be okay.

Every weekend it’s a nightmare to be at home, 10 minutes’ walk away from the beach public announcement speakers, as they scream out new orders every two minutes about only swimming inside the yellow line (preferably not swimming), not hopping into the mouths of sharks and not smoking – right into my earhole. It’s as if the speakers were inside the house. I can’t think or work as the relentless announcements screech on from 9AM to 6PM. In fact 30% of the screams seem to be about the life guards knocking off work in 30, then 15, then 5 minutes…

But there are no announcements reminding people not to drop every lemon tea container, empty water bottle and McDonald’s wrapping straight down where they stand. No, that stern admonition is reserved for dogs.

It’s a good thing the water is so disgusting it’s impossible to swim in, otherwise I’d miss going to the beach.