Back Again So Soon?

I can’t believe I’m home again! The two weeks in Mexico and the US seemed like two months because there was so much happening, and everything mine eyes looked upon I saw for the first →

Serendipity, Knob and Thomas Jefferson

Oh! Oh! Oh! USA! Talk about the exact opposite of Mexico – at least Mexico City and Horn Cow. In those two places, everyone lives behind high walls and sturdy gates. And according to my →

Mexican Wedding

You will forgive me for my thoughts and feelings straying somewhat from Cantonese recently. It’s all about the Spanish now. Now, for example, I’m in Cuernavaca which interestingly means Horn Cow. It’s a beautiful, hilly →

Thank You For Not Being An Arse

Thank you for not being an arse? That was my first reaction. Then I thought: That doesn’t make sense. Why would someone put a sign saying Thank you for not being an arse on their →

A Delicate Piece Of Medical Advice

Hong Kong’s airport – don’t you just love it? I do. It’s so so airport-y! I had been looking forward to spending a couple of hours there before my flight to Mexico (I’m now in →

SUNDAY: Finally! FINALLY!!!! My Book Online

Woo-hooo, after weeks, months and SO much hassle with the company I paid to reformat and spread my book (it’s now just in pdf exactly like the format I sent them and I had to →

Ahhhrghhhh! So Sorry Sorry Sorry I Haven’t Said This Before!

Well, I haven’t not said it before but only to a handful of people: if you’re a student of mine studying at the hallowed halls of Honolulu or just want to go to legendary Honolulu →

Who Speaks More English, Hong Kong People Or Belgian People?

Here’s one of my students, let’s call him X, taking the gun off some local on one of our outings to southern China. He’s been studying for a while now and has always done very →

It’s Beer O’Clock But Where Is The Good Beer?

I’m running a series on Facebook called Beer Is Beautiful, largely featuring this woman and her associates. And other people I know. The other day I tried ‘beer is beautiful’ in Cantonese in Honolulu Coffee →

Completely Lost In A Strange City Without Knowing A Word Of The Language

This is the very first photo I had taken of myself in China (a Chelfie?) in 1988. It was in the then famous silk market, no doubt demolished now, and the guy was probably some →

The Latest Gossip

Is being a Luddite with a Mac an oxymoron? But sometimes I think that’s what I am. Here I am, trying to make Cantonese a world language – in Hong Kong! the very stronghold of Cantonese as a world language-ism.

It’s like making coals in Newcastle or, to use a slightly more up to date aphorism, like making fake CDs in the fake DVD factory.

To make Cantonese a world language, I of course have to take it to the world! Duh! And therefore, about 30 years after it was invented, I now proudly bring you: Cantonese by SKYPE!!!!

We tried it out the other night; Ah- La, Ah-On, Ah-Yan and I in the Honolulu, canto-ing away with ah-Dak who was in a hotel room in Guangzhou. It worked brilliantly! It was just like a normal session except slightly more surreal perhaps; but that was probably just me, who’s still in awe of the fact that I can press a thing on the wall and the electric light comes on.

So people of the world, rejoice. Now you can have Canto lessons with me now matter where you live! All your questions answered, all your existential angst resolved. Or even dissolved.
So delay no more, re-activate your Skype account and let’s get world domination-ing!

A Way To Benefit From Not Joking On Stairs:

Yesterday I had a lesson at home with one of my Lantau contingent, a shy girl called ah-Kei. A big part of my language teaching is trying to get people to understand that no matter →

China Everything – The Movie. Yes, Mandarin!!!!

Three months of work are finally over and the result is a 114 minute travel, language, transport and accommodation guide to the Silk Road including Kazakhstan, and, well, anything in China really. The premiere was →

New Bust-blocker from Happy Jellyfish People’s Democratic Language Bureau!

Damn – I’ve done it! I’ve gone and betrayed my love, the Cantonese language. Well, all I’ve said about it is true and right, and it is my beloved language number 1A. It’s just that →

We Are Flogging, We Are Flogging ….

So I have this book, right? Don’t Joke On The Stairs. The title is based on a sign I saw in Gansu once, in the staircase of a language school. “Avoid the exchange of jokes →

Hono Begging For Your Patronage (Writing Course This Saturday)

I’m not kidding! After my book launch on the 6th of October where about 60 or 70 people descended, drinking hundreds of bottles of beer in the quiet time of the restaurant, the owner of →

Last Product Placement – Today

So I’ve made this two-hour Cantonese learning DVD as I’ve mentioned once or twice. Here is a short excerpt giving you a little glimpse into Going Native. It’s only HK$100, including shipping inside Hong Kong, →

Book Review!!!!

Wei wei everybody, wei! After a long absence caused by circumstances beyond my control, I’m now itching to write again. And what could be better than to start with something written by somebody else? Yep, →

More Proddie Placie. I’ve Earned It.

Finally it’s here (maybe you didn’t even know that it was going to be here???) – the second installment of Cantonese – The Movie. This DVD, all two hours of it, is for people who →

A Little Proddie Placie

Wei wei, it’s finally happening: I’m launching my new book Don’t Joke On The Stairs on Blacksmith Books this week. I actually wrote most of it four years ago and had signed a contract with →

Joke-share

Here’s a joke that I’d like to share with all Cantonese speakers/learners – well, not all. It only works if you’re caucasian. In Norway we have a saying: Beloved child has many names. So it →

Dragon Year – How Can You Get Through It Without Cantonese???

So it’s a new year again, this time rather more important than just old 2012 – it’s the year of the DRAGON. Full of upheavals and excitement, it is also the luckiest year in the →